Removing the algorithm from the modern dating equation isn’t the worst idea.
Online dating can be really hard. You can spend hours scrolling through matches and end up no closer to finding a partner. The exercise of going on date after date only to watch the chemistry fade each time can be extremely exhausting. According to a survey conducted by the online dating research platform The Single’s Report, 78.37% of Americans ages 18-54 experience emotional fatigue or burnout when dating online.
This dissatisfaction with dating apps has led singles to abandon dating apps and try other ways to find love online. One such method is creating “date me” Google Docs. These act like yours wikipedia personal page that someone can go through before deciding to meet you. If this has piqued your interest, here’s a full breakdown of the dating docs and what they tell us about modern dating.
How does the date look on me docs?
The reason these “date me” Google Docs suddenly exploded in popularity is because of a cheep made by neural network engineer Chris Olah. In the tweet, he shared his desire to create a long-form, serious dating profile. Olah self-reports that the tweet and the date me doc got so much attention that around 10,000 people see edition. He even caught the attention of Google, which found it suspicious and eventually closed the document. And so, Olah went on to share it as a blog post.
The blog post begins with the information you typically find on an online dating platform: age, gender, location, sexual orientation, and the type of relationship you’re looking for. As it goes on, it becomes more detailed, with Olah highlighting her desire for a moral connection with her partner, her love of math and science, as well as the pros and cons of dating him.
While Olah certainly popularized the idea of using Date Me Google Docs, he’s not the first to try them out. His colleague, Catherine Olsson, had done the same thing before him, but instead of tweeting it out, she just quietly added it to her Twitter bio. Unlike Olah, Olsson has less text and more images on your profile. At the time of this writing, Olsson has demolished the google doc link in his bio and he’s taken a break from dating.
Other ways to date in G-suite
Creating dating profiles isn’t the only way to use Google Docs in your romantic life. Cases of people using Google Docs to communicate with each other have been reported. At the beginning of the year, the online news publication site Quartz interviewed a couple, Kevin Pu and Sophia Sun, who fell in love on Google Docs. Pu and Sun met on Facebook and then used Google Docs as their second channel of communication, where they kept track of the topics they wanted to discuss in Google Docs.
Similarly, The New York Post shared the story of Emma King, who was enlisting the help of her boyfriend to edit her master’s thesis. The couple finally broke up share flirty messages each other in the document comments. Some people have even been using other parts of the G-suite to find dates. Blogger Jacob Falkovich has shared google forms on his blog that people can fill in to meet him platonically and romantically.
Out with the new and in with the old again?
When I first checked out Olah’s profile, the first thing that popped into my head was the Netflix show. indian matchmaker. If you’re not familiar with it, the show looks at the concept of arranged marriages within the Indian community through a reality television format. Throughout the series, Indian men and women receive detailed biodata of possible matches before meeting them and deciding to enter into a relationship.
I found little or no difference between the biodata that people received in indian matchmaker and Olah dates me Google Doc. The only difference is that instead of hiring a matchmaker, they rely on the internet to act as one.
As we discussed earlier, when people use dating apps, they tend to focus more on the fact that there are always more fish in the sea they actually nurture the relationships they find through the app. So it’s not a bad idea to make the dating pool smaller and only get those matches that actually have the same values as you.
The problem with algorithms directing you to potential matches, though, is that you’re simply waiting for someone to stumble across your Google Doc. So no one is likely to find your date me doc and connect with you unless you’re actively share it among your groups of friends.
When we get down to the nitty-gritty, these dating documents are simply a larger version of your Tinder or Bumble profile. So, if you don’t want to completely remove the algorithm from your dating process, you can always add links to your dating documents on your profiles on dating apps. If the dating platform doesn’t allow you to add clickable links to your profile, you can share your date me doc with your matches to make sure you’re on the same page about your expectations before your first date.
Header image courtesy of Unsplash